It's NEDA Week and Black History Month: Let's Talk About Both
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| *Neutral Nature Shot* |
In light of it being Black History Month as well as National Eating Disorder Awareness (NEDA) week, I will be discussing the intersectionality of eating disorders as well as racism in Diet Culture. Full Disclosure, I am no expert on the topic. However, the topic is important to think about as NEDA posts fill our social media feeds this week- Especially since NEDA, the organization, is not intersectional as it is made out to be. (More info on that in the link provided.)
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| My recent Instagram story tagging @et.the.red on the intersectionality of Eating Disorders |
When I was in the early throes of my eating disorder (2011-2013) I used to obsessively watch “My Eating Disorder Story” and “My Anorexia Story” videos on YouTube.
I wanted to feel validated in my own eating disorder.
Did I even have an eating disorder? Or was I just overreacting?
I wanted to see how thin people got to know if I was thin enough to also be considered sick.
Was I thin enough to make my own video?
I probably watched at least a hundred of these videos and most of the time, the answer was no.
One thing I noticed very quickly was that all of these videos were created by white women and just a handful of Asian women and white men. I never encountered any videos of Black women, women of color, or Black men.
And I searched for them.
I wanted to know if eating disorders were “white people problems.” Because of our privilege, because we did not experience racism, did we claim a disorder centered around losing weight merely for attention and sympathy? Because Black people and people of color experienced racism, did they just not have the emotional or mental energy to develop eating disorders? These kinds of thoughts made me feel even more guilty for asking for help. What I was feeling felt so vain and insignificant in the grand scheme of things.
(This was my thinking from ages 13-16.)
I know now that the reason I never saw Black Women or women of color make “My Eating Disorder Story” videos was because it was not and often still is not safe for them to do so.
For the most part, it is safe for white women to be vulnerable and share with the world our eating disorder stories. We are not confined by the chains of racism. Our bodies are deemed acceptable- especially if our bodies are thin. Then we are the gold standard.
For myself, it was pretty safe for me to share my own eating disorder story because I am a thin white woman. My recovered body is also thin. My story is the same eating disorder story that was perpetuated by YouTube in the 2010’s. My story is the same eating disorder story that is continued to be perpetuated by the media today.
My story does very little in helping those in larger bodies, different skin colors, and different genders. (I am very happy if I have helped larger bodied people and/or people of color but I do not expect it.)
Although representation of eating disorders has become more intersectional over the years, we must continue doing the work to destigmatize people with eating disorders who are not thin, white, cisgendered, straight, or female.
For this year’s National Eating Disorder Awareness week I wish to draw attention away from me. Instead, I want to advocate for men with eating disorders, Black women with eating disorders, Black men with eating disorders, people of color with eating disorders, larger bodies with eating disorders, LGBTQ and nonbinary people with eating disorders.
Eating Disorders do not look like a specific body type or skin color or sexuality or gender. (Fun fact, most people with eating disorders do not meet the qualifications of Anorexia.) Eating Disorders are a mental disorder, not a physical disorder. Anyone can develop one.
This is mainly because of the unavoidability and pervasiveness of Diet Culture in western society. We are conditioned to adhere to Diet Culture as much as we are conditioned to adhere to racism. The two are as intertwined as unavoidable. Diet Culture only exists because of colonialism, capitalism, and racism. And capitalism and racism help uphold Diet Culture. It is the status quo.
Historically, the black body has been exploited and brutalized since European colonizers began colonizing. That has not gone away. Black bodies have and continue to be seen as less valuable and less desirable than White bodies.
Diet Culture pushes the narrative that worth is measured in weight: the skinnier the body, the more worthy a person. Racism and White Supremacy pushes the narrative that worth is measured in skin tone: The lighter the skin, (the more European the features), the more worthy a person. Together, both unattainable pressures make it more difficult for people of color and Black people to ask for help or tell their eating disorder story.
But what about the Body Positivity movement in recent years?
Hasn’t that helped with fighting Diet Culture?
Yes and no.
The Body Positive Movement while coined by fat Black women has been claimed and since taken over by White women. The movement somehow started out intersectional and has now become monopolized by white women. So yeah, while it can make other white women feel good, it does not necessarily help anyone else.
When I was first attempting to ask for help for my eating disorder, I encountered several roadblocks. I was told I was not thin enough. I was told that losing my period was normal for a female athlete. I was assured and reassured time and time again that I was fine. It was all incredibly invalidating. So I retreated. I simply did not have the energy to demand the care I deserved.
I was a thin white woman asking for help and it was still difficult to get help and be taken seriously! I cannot imagine what it is like for a fat Black woman, or a transgender man, or anyone who does not look like the classic anorexic emaciated white woman to seek help for their eating disorder.
Here are some awesome people of color to follow on Instagram who talk specifically on Diet Culture, Racism, Nutrition, and Eating Disorders.
If you are struggling with an Eating Disorder or Disordered Eating, I see you. I hear you. I know how invalidating having either can be in a society that praises thinner bodies.
Be Kind and Stay Safe Out There.
With love,
Emily
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